sometimesagreatnotion:

THINGS MY SON SHOULD KNOW AFTER I’VE DIED

I was young once. I dug holes
near a canal and almost drowned.
I filled notebooks with words
as carefully as a hunter loads his shotgun.
I had a father also, and I came second to an addiction.
I spent a summer swallowing seeds
and nothing ever grew in…

beenthinking:

“When you consider things like the stars, our affairs don’t seem to matter very much, do they?”  Virginia Woolf

“I can only note that the past is beautiful because one never realises an emotion at the time. It expands later, and thus we don’t have complete emotions about the present, only about the past.” Virginia Woolf

“But what if I know that I’m right now, and my future self is the one I don’t trust?” Jonathan Franzen

…it’s been a sort of week for bath tub thinking and reading.

the best advice i’ve gotten all semester: 

fake it till you make it.

sorry about my lack of posts lately.

 I started my last year of grad school a few weeks ago - and so far its been a doozy. 

im just not feeling like i have anything really definitive to say these days. 

i cant even report on my recent dinners, since they have mainly consisted of potato chips and cottage cheese, and ben and jerrys ice cream. 

im not sad, or happy, or excited, or up or down, or here or there.  im somewhere in the middle of it all.  suspended in animation. 

im seeing and feeling things i have never seen or felt before, and im not yet sure how to react to them.   once i know, i have a sense im going to be a flood of emotions and ideas.    but for now im just letting it all wash over me. 

A few weeks ago i turned 29, and every day since then has been a challenge.  pushing myself to do something uncomfortable and new and risky…stretching my ideas of the world to change and expand.

I dont mean to be vague.  but, frankly, thats just exactly how i feel right now. 

pre-surgery shaving party.

a’yep.

k.

saw a HUGE FIRE on the road tonight. apparently it was a natural gas explosion. totally devestating.

k.

[san bruno, ca]

note to self:

it might not be a good idea to start “Jillian Michael’s 30 day Shred” program the same week i am starting my new schedule of

classes, work, and my internship in the ER.

oof. 

Welcome september, bring it on.

(picture found on random google search…)

“working” in the er. 

*gulp*  

not sure im going to get much sleep tonight.

wish me luck. 

(a)

um, brilliant.

internerd:

Forgot to share this earlier…

My birthday card from The Girls

<3

its a good day when your partner chips in and helps to mend the “scraps quilt”.

and let me tell you, this boy can SEW!

k.